Alcoholics Anonymous

After completing a voluntary 30 day stay in an addiction center for alcohol, I decided to give AA meetings a shot, for continued support in my sobriety.
As previously stated I went into a non 12 step program, so, going to AA was a huge obstacle for me, due to my beliefs.

I have many difficulties with some of the tenets AA prescribes, more later...

I gird my loins and go to an early morning meeting; figuring if nothing else, I will put my butt in a seat and have some semblance of a schedule.

The only requirement to attend an AA meeting is ' To have desire to stop drinking'. I get that, I can agree to that.

That day, the reading was about not judging others. It is an open meeting so all have a right to share, though no cross-talking is allowed. I listened to apx. 40 people give their take on the reading, I passed.

Maybe I had mis-judged the program? I was trying to keep an open mind. Though it felt very 'churchy' to me with the prayers, offering baskets, amens, etc. I made a conscious decision to return.

I have since been back to meetings and continue to have all my beliefs about AA confirmed.

No one said this sober thang was easy, but geez, now when I leave a meeting I want to 1. kill myself, or 2. get a drink!

Not sure this is working for me....