Alcoholics Anonymous Meeting-Missed again

I voluntarily attend Alcoholics Anynomous meetings, sometimes even on a regular basis, when I want to slit my wrists.

I was somewhat planning to attend the morning meeting this morning to see al my new found 'friends'. I have not been since New Year's Eve morning.

I had planned to start my morning off by attending an Alcoholic's Anonymous meeting....

I find these hypocrites somewhat entertaining. They claim they care about all who attend and are there to support everyone, and be non-judgemental. I attended this particular group for approximately 3 weeks. All anyone knows about me is my name. No one asked a word about me, nor for my number, in case I needed help, but they are all-caring!

Some of these people are lifers, this is their sole purpose in life, to attend meetings and spout their version of the truth.
There is also an unstated belief that if you do not show up for a meeting daily, you must have been drinking.

Gads, they must think I am in a gutter dead somewhere or in prison!

I considered going due to the fact I need support for the upcoming weekend. My biggest trigger, my father, is coming for a visit.

I have already considered hiding a bottle or flask for when he drives me over the edge. I figure it will take 5 seconds. Yes, thinking, not acting...it is allowed, at least in my mind.

So, when I woke up this am, i thought, hmmm, I would have to hurry to get to the meeting, nah, why??

Maybe Thursday morning I'll attend a meeting.

That work thing sometimes gets in the way of my life and those Alcoholic's Anonymous meetings.